Praying For Voodoo
An impending solar eclipse, that is expected to darken much of East and South Asia for upto 6 minutes at its peak, is prompting action from the White House.
US President Obama is eager to take advantage of the many religious rituals and practices designed to ward off evil and bring good luck during the solar eclipse, which is believed to be unauspicious according to local superstitions.
“Our nation and the world face many hurdles in the coming months, the least of which is this economic malaise and recession,” said White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs. “President Obama wishes to take advantage of this flurry of activity among adherents of Asian religions to help the wider world.”
According to sources familiar with the matter, President Obama plans to appoint a special envoy to the parts of Asia expected to affected by the solar eclipse. The representative will work closely with priests and practioners to implement the most effective rituals and prayers.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is also expected to return to the South Asian Subcontinent to coordinate the necessary religious efforts with senior government officials in India, while the envoy will focus on China and South-East Asia.
Many Republicans are outraged at this latest development, but there are disagreements within the GOP. Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell has declared he will filibuster any efforts to enact legislation related to this matter. “No wait, can we still do that?” said his spokesman.
Senator John McCain declared that “rampant pork-barrel spending is depriving federal agencies of scarce resources, at the whim of individual members of Congress. Obama is once adding billions of pork through his latest actions.”
